explaining homosexuality to a child..

[theZEAlot (formerly Mara)]

minsan, sumagi sa isip ko... paano nga ba kapag dumating na kami sa point na mag aadopt na kami ng baby? and as he grows older, paano ko i-eexplain sa kanya na wala syang mommy pero dalawa ang daddy nya? or currently, hindi ko din alam kung paano ipapaliwanag sa mga pamangkin ko ang relasyon naming dalawa, just in case they would wonder kung bakit lalaki ang ka relasyon ko?

kayo, have you been in the similar scenario? how did u react on that? how did you explain it?

share your thoughts.. some other people there might need some enlightenment regarding this

[T'yang]

i imagine it would be like explaining sex.

[kabalyero]

daanin mo sa scientific way - ala Nat Geo way, with visual aids like dalawang male penguins, at kung ano ano pang hayop na pwedeng mamuhay kahit dalawang lalake or dalawang babae.  Homosexuality in animal kingdom, meron yon. -

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexual_behavior_in_animals


ang tanong:  So tito/Dad, ako rin po ba eh pwede magka BF (kung lalake ang pamangkin/adopted child) ? dyaran! 

[GeekyGuide]

It's definitely a big question and one that requires careful thought.

You guys could focus on just raising him with the right values and reinforcing his character before we start getting into societal constructs like gender roles. It should be more about the two of you being his parents and how loved he is rather than burdening the child (and yourselves) with the need to define or label the nature of your relationship.

The classic "when two people love each other very much" stories should still work, and as he ages you deal with the specific situations from school encounters as they come along. Friends will eventually question and maybe even make fun of him, but as long as you raised him to be open-minded and clearly reminded that you love him or her, then things should work out.

Scary thought though - Garapata and I puzzle over this a lot and I know I'm a bit more scared about it than he is. I guess I'm paranoid that way or whatever you want to call it.

[theZEAlot (formerly Mara)]

yun nga lang kasi, ang hirap sa ibang tao.. ultimong bata na walang kamuwang-muwang eh kukwestyunin ukol sa ganyang usapan. eh ano ba naman malay ng bata dyan? well, anyway, i guess medyo magkakaroon na ako ng practice, since may mga pamangkin ako.. and my partner is getting closer with my family..

[T'yang]

"Explaining" it takes a lot a tact and time.
It's not like a one time explanation and everything should be okay from there on.
(hence just like explaining how sex works [?].)

However, we still have to consider the environment we live in, ie neighbors, schoolmates, etc.
No matter how well we have explained it there will be external factors that might lead the child into confusion.

The former housemate once responded to me on the topic of my niece and some family issues, "Magtiwala ka kung paano mo pinalaki ung bata. Don't underestimate them."

[Elphaba]

"Explaining" it takes a lot a tact and time.
It's not like a one time explanation and everything should be okay from there on.
(hence just like explaining how sex works [?].)

However, we still have to consider the environment we live in, ie neighbors, schoolmates, etc.
No matter how well we have explained it there will be external factors that might lead the child into confusion.

The former housemate once responded to me on the topic of my niece and some family issues, "Magtiwala ka kung paano mo pinalaki ung bata. Don't underestimate them."

agree

[T'yang]

I just realized, i know a lot of (for the lack of better term) well bred gay couples.
Sometimes I hope that they have children, biologically or otherwise.

[levi]

being close with my bf;s niece is comedy to me, nagtampo yung bata saken, then walked-out on me, then blurted out from across the room (with bf and he;s mom in the scene)
" ayuko na sayo tito tan! dun na lng ako sa isang lalake ni tito glenn (refering to hubby;s ex)!"
ofcourse, hubby laughed so hard while me already having cold sweat"


then nung nasa garage naman, i was in the car preparing to leave with hubby, then i heard hubby's sis and niece talking
:tita, bat dami lalake ni tito glenn, san si tito japs( hubby's ex)? bago nanaman si tito tan?"
ofcourse all i heard was laughing on sis' part. since tumawa din ako.lol


tho all is well as the niece will come to me and say,:" i love you tito tan", every before she sleeps:)

[Naivete]

sa mata ng bata, ang ginagawa ng nakatatanda ay nagiging tama...

I guess, if a child grows up seeing two men in love with each other, the child will grow to think that that is just normal... isn't that what we want to happen? for people to start treating homosexuality as something that is as natural as heterosexuality? so why the need to explain this and end up appearing to be trying to defend your actions when it's just something that comes naturally?

[mortecno]

sa mata ng bata, ang ginagawa ng nakatatanda ay nagiging tama...
I guess, if a child grows up seeing two men in love with each other, the child will grow to think that that is just normal... isn't that what we want to happen? for people to start treating homosexuality as something that is as natural as heterosexuality? so why the need to explain this and end up appearing to be trying to defend your actions when it's just something that comes naturally?

true naivete but that i assume is only plausible if no other children or parent questions it, which would either make their children question your child as to why s/he has two daddies/mommies and why doesn't s/he have the other.
even though it does come naturally historical baggage (i.e church, politics, norms and mores and such over time) has screwed us homosexuals over and not in the good way.

[T'yang]

or having a homosexual relative.

[garapata]

http://togetherforjacksoncountykids.tumblr.com/post/14314184651/one-teachers-approach-to-preventing-gender-bullying-in


This I think would make it easier.
If only more teachers were this intelligent.

[Elphaba]

love it